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Living right July 24, 2007

Posted by Sparkel in random.

Things are slowly getting back to normal, but not at the same time.  It feels sort of like everything shifted, but it might just be me.  My grandmothers death seems to have cause epiphany after epiphany.  I feel sort of like I’m waking up after a long, strange dream, and I finally seem to have dropped a huge portion of my anger weight.  M’s sister apologized for “not being a friend” to me in a card she gave me the other day, with flowers and a big hug.  Things in the house are actually peaceful.  I’ve been collecting pictures of my grandmother from my cousin and parents, and I hope to go to my aunt’s sometime this week to pick up boxes of photos.  The plan is to scan them all in at my weekend job, and put all the pictures to CD’s to give to various family members at the memorial service.  I also want to make a DVD with a montage of photos put to music.  I really hope I can finish it by Monday.

I’ve decided to start eating right.  I saw the soda report on the news, and really, really don’t want to be unhealthy anymore, so this morning I stopped by Target on my way to work, and got a 24 pack of bottled water, Special K snack bars, and applesauce.  I’m going to make another fruit salad when I get home today, and have that for breakfast from now on.  I got my caramel macchiato, but it’s more of a farewell, because I’m not going to get them in the morning anymore.  I’ll get one at night, and only if I really want one.  I’m going to start going to the gym hopefully every day, if not then every other day. 

I’m also getting smarter about money.  It only took 7 years of making it to finally learn how to manage it!  I’m making lists of things I truly want, then waiting a week before looking back over the list.  It’s amazing how many things I completely forget about.  I’ve decided to keep $2000 from the money my mom gave me in my checking account, just to have a nice little nest there, and the rest is going to a CD this weekend. 

I’ve also decided to finally start doing all the things I’ve always wanted to, just never got around to.  The weekend after we come back from the funeral I’m going skydiving.  M and I are getting passports this week because we finally decided to go to El Salvador for Christmas, and we’re getting the tickets as soon as we can.  We talked the other night about opening a savings account for our wedding, and he said that with his new raise he can afford to put in $100 a month, and I figured I can afford $50 a month, so we’re going to start that soon.  We’re also starting to plan Europe, which I’m more excited about than anything. 

Things are looking up, which is what my grandmother told me she wishes for me.  I think it’s sad that her death seems to be the kick in the ass I needed, but I’m sure she would be happy knowing she impacted her loved ones lives so much. 

Back to work, more later



1. nicoleantoinette - December 22, 2007

I know I’m commenting on this months and months later, but I’m really sorry about your grandmother. I can see what you mean though, about how such a shocking and important event can trigger both epiphanies and the desire to make big changes. That’s how I respond to things as well, by doing big grandiose things. For some reason, it makes me feel better.

Did you go skydiving?! I’ve been once and LOVED it. I totally want to go again asap.

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