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I want cartwheels too, dammit July 25, 2007

Posted by Sparkel in M.

I didn’t get to the gym last night.  Instead M and I cleaned the house, which actually turned out to be a better workout.  I scrubbed the kitchen down, washed and put away a ton of dishes, vacuumed the living room and swept up the kitchen floor while M painted the upstairs bathroom.  Then we watched My Life on the D List, which cracks us both up, and then I showered and he watched The Colbert Report, then the news while I read the new Oprah magazine and he gave me a foot massage.  All in all, we were the picture of a happy, homeowning couple. 

I went into the office, as I do most nights now, to spend some time by myself.  It’s probably my favorite part of the house.  All of my books, some candles, and the pink pillows from my old “all mine” room are in there, and I can sit there and read, or play my music, or watch my DVD’s without someone sighing or asking if we can watch something else.  This room is an apparent necessity for me in my neverending quest to maintain my sanity.

So, last night I watched parts of The Notebook, and I was overcome with the NEED for, as one of my favorite bloggers put it (yes I’m a nerd), cartwheels.  Figurative cartwheels.  As in a guy who is “so happy to be with meeee, that he just wants to do cartwheels.”

Don’t get me wrong…for me, there is no other guy than M.  He is in many, many ways everything I’ve always wanted and hoped for and more.  Its just that we’ve surpassed the honeymoon phase, and there are times when knowing that part of our relationship is behind us really makes me sad and wistful.  The first year of our relationship is my favorite part of my life so far.  It was so full of butterflies and being completely inseparable, and giddyness and holding hands, and arguing over who loves who more.  The classic cliche in every way, and I loved every second of it. 

I know that what we have now is in many ways better.  Comfortable, stable and real love and intimacy.  I just can’t help wishing he would act more like he did in the beginning.  Constantly surprise me, say sweet things, send me poems, call just to hear my voice…the works.

I know I’m a typical girl, but really…is it too much to ask for cartwheels?



1. nicoleantoinette - December 22, 2007

1. I love, love, LOVE Kathy Griffin.
2. Every time I watch The Notebook I get like that too.
3. I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost two years and I know what you mean about being wistful for the very beginning. But it sounds like you and M have a wonderful relationship and that’s worth so much more…

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