A few of my favorites October 24, 2007Posted by Sparkel in hee.
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Randomly, these are a few of my favorite stories that have either happened to me or were told to me. Some of them probably won’t be amusing unless you a) were there or b) know the people involved, but whatev. I’m mostly writing so I’ll have something to go back and smile about when I have a bad day (because yes, sometimes I go back and read my own blog. I am that vain.)
* A casual friend in high school told me this story. She moved to the US from Africa when she was ten. Her family didn’t have a lot of money, so she didn’t have a lot of clothes. As a result, she wore the same pair of light gray sweatpants to school every day for the first two weeks. One day an obnoxious boy called her on it, and when she denied it (in an adorable accent) he took a black sharpie, and to prove himself right, drew a large X on one of the legs of her pants. She said that she’s not quite sure why (because she did have a couple other pants), but she wore the pants the next day, so the kid pointed to her and yelled that he was right and started laughing. She said it was the most traumatic experience of her childhood.
* When my brother was fifteen my dad got him a summer job at his work. One day they were at home arguing about some of the guys they worked with. My dad was trying to get my brother to remember a guy he was telling a story about, and my brother said “oh, that fat guy with the big head?” My sister walked in mid-sentence (she was about 10) and said (in the sweetest, angriest, most defensive tone you can imagine) “GOD SHANE! Why do you always have to make fun of dad??” It took a few seconds for them to catch on (I immediately began laughing my ass off) and my dad goes “Gee Deanna, that’s what you think of me? I’m just a fat guy with a big head?” She was so apologetic and upset. To this day, it’s probably the hardest I’ve ever laughed.
* My sister was somewhat strange as a child. We were staying at my cousins house when I was nine (making her 7) and she got one of those humongous lollipops:
My cousins had a rope swing in their backyard, which Deanna decided to climb on with the lollipop in hand. She had hair that went halfway down her back. I think you can tell where this is going. She got off the swing and walked over to us and wailed “my haaaaaiiiirrrr!!”, which was wrapped around the lollipop. My cousins and I could not stop laughing long enough to help her, so my grandmother came outside and tried to untangle her hair while asking her how she could be so dense.